Thought of the Day

I don't believe in morality, but I believe in ethical conduct as set out by His Holiness the Dalai Lama: "Ethical conduct = a way of behaving that respects others’ right to be happy".

Thursday, 15 March 2007


yesterday i was feeling miserable, but lofty dragged me to a free stand-up comedy in a local club. i am against stand-up comedy in principle: this tradition in italy is not as strong as here. the only comedian i follow is beppe grillo who is deeply involved in political/eco issues and extremely acronimous and i used to happily watch zelig, a comic television programme with silly gigs. the truth is that i have still serious issues in understanding the various accents and/or english (dry) humour and am a bit annoyed by this habit of having to make giggle, if not laugh, or to always come up with witty lines in every occasion: in weddings' and wakes' speeches, at presentations, meetings, etc. but i went. and i laughed. a lot. the only one i did not really get was a scot guy with a hard accent and an under-stated irony.

tonight i feel a loser. i was supposed to go to a country western music gig of a friend who is releasing his first album, but a stressed-related headache trapped me at home. after two paracetamols, a dinner and some rest, i am better and i regret that i didn't go. i am watching celebrity fame academy and celebrity apprentice (all for comic relief - a series of charity shows to boost celebrities' ego and collect millions of pounds for a good cause) is about to start - my slim consolations.

i have just got a message reading: "we have been invited to sara's wedding on 14 april". the message came from my friend claudia. this is a long story, but to cut it *short*, sara has been my best friend for five years (while at school), until she decided that drugs were a better company than me. she completely lost the plot until she got arrested and started a long and slow, but successful, redemption. since then i have been too much disappointed by her lies and behaviour and lost touch. i saw her again last september after many years and she looked genuinly happy to see me. now i have got this invitation... less than one month before the event. i should change my flight and book two more days off work to be able to make it. i don't know what to do. i really don't. she rejected my friendship when she was still *lucid*, and all i could do when i got to know exactly what was going on in her life was to remain behind the scenes.
but i do not have any resentements towards her or regrets towards myself for not having helped her not to fall in the drugs trap. however, her image haunted me for months. 10 years have gone since, and she is now a committed student and commendable volunteer working with heavily disabled guys. i would feel a bit of regret if i don't go, but i feel a bit let down (again) from the fact that she let me know of her big day with 29 days of notice, knowing, what's more, that i live in another country... what a dilemma...

No comments: